She tells me many things these days. She announces that she loves mama, daddy, elliot, choo choo trains, drawing, ice cream, yellow. She is always up to read books, go for walks, make drawings. She is always singing. She is constantly on the look for playgrounds. She picks dozens of dandylions and brings them home "For Elliot". She calls Elliot "her baby". She likes to put treasures (pennies, pebbles) in her pockets. She dreams up ideas and shares them with me. She is the most charming person that I have ever met. She is my whole heart.
I am frightened. Everyday I see so much indifference, selfishness, and greed in this world and I see my beautiful bright little girl with her kind heart and sweet soul in the very middle of it. Sometimes I wonder, what have I done? Bringing her to this awful place. I am not sure how to help her to be good and kind yet strong and tough all at once. I am trying to show her all of the love and beauty that is here, to remember that there is still a little good to be had and to be made. I am not sure I have faith in our world anymore, but I will always try to have faith in her.
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